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Post by swiatowit on Feb 13, 2006 20:22:00 GMT 2
Gay died and, because of his religious- at all- life went to heaven. Then his angel was lead him, and then his shoe string cracked. He bended to tie it, and then- the gay couldn't resist. Angel got iritated and said: 'One more time- and you'll go to Hell'. Situation has been repeated. He brought the gay to Hell, but it has made regret him. He said: 'If you will be good, I swear, that I'll come back for you for one year'. Year had gone, angel came back... and he didn't identify the Hell!!! It was cold and dark. He went to Lucifer and asked him: 'Hey Lucy! Why it's just cold? You don't burn in stove?!?!' 'OK- said Lucifer- try to bend for the wood...
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Post by Heiðinn Hermaðr on Feb 13, 2006 23:47:17 GMT 2
haha, your jokes are also funny But about the farmer, there's just no logical in it, it's just the nonsense that makes it funny, maybe you should tell it and not read it...it''s too stupid for words I think I understand it. Here we have something similar like... "Hey dad can I buy that Icecream ? Haven't you already got a window in your bedroom ? Yes, But I like riding my bike !" ---- The search for intelligent lifeCaptain Kirk and an away team, searching for intelligent life on other planets, traveled down to Earth after going through a time disturbance cloud, landing in Washington D.C. right in the middle of Clinton's inaugural ball. After looking around, Kirk says: "Beam us up, Scotty. There's no intelligent life down on this one."
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Post by huisgriezel on Feb 14, 2006 11:49:10 GMT 2
That makes no sense at all indeed XD! but that makes it kinda funny I think XD
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Post by burto89 on Feb 23, 2006 8:35:12 GMT 2
Q: how many lead guitarists does it take to screw in a lightbulb A: just one. he holds the light bulb up and the world revolves around him.
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Post by thyr on Feb 23, 2006 21:25:07 GMT 2
At the immigrationoffice.... Q.: "Name?" A.: "Abdul Dalah Sarafi." Q.: "Sex?" A.: "Four times a week." Q.: "No, no, no... Male or female?" A.: "Male, female,... sometimes camel..." ;D ;D Haha
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Post by swiatowit on Feb 24, 2006 20:41:28 GMT 2
loool...
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Post by Heiðinn Hermaðr on Feb 28, 2006 0:00:57 GMT 2
At the immigrationoffice.... Q.: "Name?" A.: "Abdul Dalah Sarafi." Q.: "Sex?" A.: "Four times a week." Q.: "No, no, no... Male or female?" A.: "Male, female,... sometimes camel..." HAHAHAHAHA ;D My French friend told me a similar one: At the immigrationoffice... - Name ? - Juan Valdéz - Sex ? - Yes, Please ! ;D
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Post by Kochevneg on Feb 28, 2006 11:07:32 GMT 2
Two beer, or not two beer: that is the question!
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Post by thyr on Feb 28, 2006 14:50:41 GMT 2
One beer is not beer. Two beer is one beer. But one beer is not beer....
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Post by Crow on Feb 28, 2006 15:24:16 GMT 2
Two cannibals were eating a clown. Asks one cannibal the other 'do you think this one tastes funny?'
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Post by Heiðinn Hermaðr on Feb 28, 2006 16:13:46 GMT 2
Two cannibals were eating a clown. Asks one cannibal the other 'do you think this one tastes funny?' hahaha goooood.... The Talking ClockWhile proudly showing off his new apartment to friends late one night, the drunk led the way to his bedroom where there was a big brass gong. "What's that big brass gong for?" one of the guests asked. "Why, that's the talking clock" the man replied. "How does it work?" "Watch", the man said, giving it an ear-shattering pound with a hammer. Suddenly, someone on the other side of the wall screamed, "For fuck sake, you wanker, it's 2am in the fucking morning!!"
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Post by jarmo on Feb 28, 2006 16:19:38 GMT 2
Some short sketch from the Goon-show:
Bluebottle What time is it Eccles? Eccles Err, just a minute. I, I've got it written down 'ere on a piece of paper. A nice man wrote the time down for me this morning. Bluebottle Ooooh, then why do you carry it around with you Eccles? Eccles Well, umm, if a anybody asks me the ti-ime, I ca-can show it to dem. Bluebottle Wait a minute Eccles, my good man... Eccles What is it fellow? Bluebottle It's writted on this bit of paper, what is eight o'clock, is writted. Eccles I know that my good fellow. That's right, um, when I asked the fella to write it down, it was eight o'clock. Bluebottle Well then. Supposing when somebody asks you the time, it isn't eight o'clock? Eccles Ah, den I don't show it to dem. Bluebottle Ooohhh... Eccles [Smacks lips] Yeah. Bluebottle Well how do you know when it's eight o'clock? Eccles I've got it written down on a piece of paper! Bluebottle Oh, I wish I could afford a piece of paper with the time written on. Eccles Oohhhh. Bluebottle 'Ere Eccles? Eccles Yah. Bluebottle Let me hold that piece of paper to my ear would you? - 'Ere. This piece of paper ain't goin'. Eccles What? I've been sold a forgery! Bluebottle No wonder it stopped at eight o'clock. Eccles Oh dear. Bluebottle You should get one of them tings my grandad's got. Eccles Oooohhh? Bluebottle His firm give it to him when he retired. Eccles Oooohhh. Bluebottle It's one of dem tings what it is that wakes you up at eight o'clock, boils the kettil, and pours a cuppa tea. Eccles Ohhh yeah! What's it called? Um. Bluebottle My granma. Eccles Ohh... Ohh, ah wait a minute. How does she know when it's eight o'clock? Bluebottle She's got it written down on a piece of paper!
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Post by Olli The Drunk Bear on May 3, 2006 22:31:44 GMT 2
God dammit, I have one hell of a stiff neck. I took some Viagra today and it got stuck in my throat- I thank you
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Post by Olli The Drunk Bear on May 4, 2006 20:05:13 GMT 2
Ha! Heres another one. A man was walking his dog through the woods and he saw a cannible crying. "Whats the matter?" Asks the man. " I just dumped my girlfriend" Replies the cannible
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Post by CrazyMary on May 5, 2006 4:19:44 GMT 2
Important scientific advance
A British company is developing computer chips which store music, to be implanted in women's breasts. This is viewed as a major breakthrough as, up until now, women have complained that men were staring at their breasts and not listening to them.
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