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Post by Olli The Drunk Bear on May 5, 2006 10:15:35 GMT 2
Ha Ha thats very good CrazyMary
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Post by Hiding on May 6, 2006 3:34:48 GMT 2
Concerning black humour... Children are debating who is the coolest. One says: Parents presented me the best car in the world with my own driver! The second: And my parents presented me a new 4-rooms flat with my own cook, chrwoman, etc... The third: You all suck! My parents bought me a post of President when I grow up! In the corner a quiet boy says: But I'm not ill with cancer ;D
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TomS
Clansman
Keeping "The Spirit" alive
Posts: 361
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Post by TomS on May 6, 2006 3:38:18 GMT 2
A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks: "Why the long face?".
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Post by Heiðinn Hermaðr on May 6, 2006 5:27:28 GMT 2
A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks: "Why the long face?". hahaha good ! A blind man visits the state of TexasThere once was a blind man who decided to visit Texas. When he arrived on the plane, he felt the seats and said, "Wow, these seats are big!" The person next to him answered, "Everything is big in Texas." When he finally arrived in Texas, he decided to visit a bar. Upon arriving in the bar, he ordered a beer and got a mug placed between his hands. He exclaimed, "Wow these mugs are big!" The bartender replied, "Everything is big in Texas." After a couple of beers, the blind man asked the bartender where the bathroom was located. The bartender replied, "Second door to the right." The blind man headed for the bathroom, but accidentally tripped over and skipped the second door. Instead, he entered the third door, which lead to the swimming pool and fell into the pool by accident. Scared to death, the blind man started shouting, "Don't flush, don't flush!"
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Post by Olli The Drunk Bear on May 6, 2006 14:45:35 GMT 2
Why didn't the bike go to the party? ...becuase he was two tyred! - Oh, I my make myself cry of laughter sometimes.
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Post by twilightheart on May 6, 2006 15:06:34 GMT 2
A horse walks into a bar, the bartender asks: "Why the long face?". Damn, that was a good one! ROFL!! ;D
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Post by Olli The Drunk Bear on May 6, 2006 19:29:02 GMT 2
Whats wrong with my jokes? *cries*
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Post by greenhorn on May 7, 2006 17:17:53 GMT 2
How about the "good" old Chuck Norris jokes ?
Chuck Norris is so hard His Cowboy boots are made of real Cowboys
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keks
Wolfcub
Posts: 20
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Post by keks on May 7, 2006 17:45:09 GMT 2
what is a dustbin under a traffic-light? - a polish disco
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Post by swiatowit on May 7, 2006 19:22:41 GMT 2
Keks, you're right! But it's a bit sad. -Only Chuck Norris knows if Bill from Tokio Hotel is male or female.
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Post by Olli The Drunk Bear on May 8, 2006 11:14:27 GMT 2
I bought my wife a rocket the other day for her birthday. So I gave it to her and she goes "Now why the fuck would I want this?" So I replied "Well you wanted space- now fuck off!" Thank you and good night! Don't forget to tip the waiter and have a safe journey home!.
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Post by magnas on May 15, 2006 1:37:09 GMT 2
Chuck Norris counted up to infinity. Twice Chuck Norris ordered Bic Mac in KFC and got it. Chuck Norris is the only man who defeated concrete wall in tenis. There is no evolution theory. There is only list of species which Chuck Norris let to survive. There were no weapons of mass destruction in Iraq, Chuck Norris lives in USA. Chuck Norris have invented all colors except pink. The pink color was invented by Tom Cruise. Chuck Norris died ten years ago, but Death isn't so brave to tell him it.
and from other topic: Hunter tells friends about his vacation in Africa: -I killed two lions, three elephants, four hippos and twenty nopleasers- one friend asks: -what the hell is nopleaser? -it looks almost like human, it's black and if you take aim at it, it starts to scream "NO, NO PLEASE!"
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Anna
Wolfcub
Posts: 40
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Post by Anna on Aug 23, 2006 23:04:16 GMT 2
what is green and runs through the woods?
a hoard of cucumbers!
sorry, not really funny but if you imagine it, it´s sweet.
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Post by carya on Aug 24, 2006 11:24:54 GMT 2
Hm, my favorite joke is a bit longer... Well, the crew of a smaller ship shipwrecked...40men and one woman...After one week, the woman died because of a snake-bite. After one week the captain went to his crew: "Well folks, everything ok with you?" Crew:" Yeah, doesn't matter." Two weeks later: Captain:"Crew, how is it going...can you handle it...?" Crew:"No problem, no problem..." One month later: Captain:" Guys, that can't still be ok, is it?" Crew:"Hm..uuuh...It works..." Again one month later: Captain: "Folks, you know...you can't still have no problems!" Crew:"Hm...ok...you're right. We really should bury her now..." I like that joke...
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Post by A Kat Person on Aug 29, 2006 10:32:05 GMT 2
NEW YORK - A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International Airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a set square, a slide rule, and a calculator.
At a morning press conference, Homeland Security Secretary Michael Chertoff said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.
"Al-gebra is a problem for us," Chertoff said. "They desire solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in a search of absolute value. They use secret code names like 'x' and 'y' and refer to themselves as 'unknowns,' but we have determined they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country. As the Greek philanderer Isosceles used to say, 'There are 3 sides to every triangle.' "
When asked to comment on the arrest, President Bush said, "If God had wanted us to have better Weapons of Math Instruction, He would have given us more fingers and toes." White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the president.
;D
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